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by Samantha Madison

I’m reading a fantastic book right now with my best friends called, “Grace for the Good Girl.”

I realized that I am a try-hard good girl. And let me tell you, this book is perfect for me, and it’s message is probably relevant for all you good girls out there.

The author, Emily Freeman, shares her story about growing up good. Going to church, staying away from boys, dreaming of her perfect future marriage and home, serving in church, and making sure everyone knew how good she was.

Oh how we can relate…

We all genuinely want to be good. We want people to think We’re good. We want to look good too. We want goodness to radiate from us, and we feel good when people recognize it.

We all want to be a good woman that everybody loves. One that reminds you of those advertisements from the 50’s. You know, the thin, glowing wife wearing an apron and a gleaming smile whilst cleaning her kitchen. We want to be that wife who never has a dirty home, and certainly doesn’t let her husband go hungry! We want to be a good mom who’s kids are thriving in a home where their parents never argue, and their mommy always leaves them a little note in their lunch box.

If we’re not yet married or mothers, we want everybody to love us for our zeal and energy. We certainly are never unhappy or discontent with our lives, because nobody likes a downer! We want everyone to know how well we follow the rules and we long to please everyone we meet with our sunny outlook on life.

And when people don’t think we’re as good as we want them too…we go out and do more good things to change their opinion on us.

What a cycle, and what a waste of time!

What’s most funny is how much irony is in this cycle we put ourselves through. The fact that we yearn for so much affirmation, so much recognition, and so much praise is selfishness. And selfishness is definitely not…well… good.

Personally, I’ve talked God’s ear off on this particular topic. I’ve told God how hard it is to be good…about how it’s so tiring. He brought me to this conclusion.

Goodness is a character trait, and it is derived from godliness. We are human beings who often fail, but if we know that we have God on the inside of us, goodness will naturally flow out from us.

Goodness comes from God. After all, he is goodness in and of itself! Only he can create a goodness in us that is so beautiful and incandescent it will be hard to miss. So we don’t have to wear ourselves out by working for it, we can let go of our try-hard lifestyle. What a sweet revelation!

It’s not about us, and it never has been. Striving to be virtuous is well and good, but God doesn’t tell us to make sure everyone knows how virtuous we are and idolize ourselves. Our purposes in life are to be humble women who meet the needs of others and have a passion for serving the broken. That is true goodness.

Let’s let go of radiating our own goodness. Let’s radiate God’s goodness to others.

How will you radiate goodness to others this week?

Sammie Madison is a 20 year old college student who has a passion for God and a passion for women. After experiencing abuse in her childhood, she decided it was her lifelong mission to minister and counsel women who have been taken advantage of. She believes that women who are walking in freedom will flourish-and she wants to be a part of that healing. She is currently studying Christian Ministries and Christian Counseling at Southeastern University. For Sammie, writing is a new found joy used to convey what God is speaking to her, or sometimes just the random musings of a single 20 year old girl. You can read Sammie’s blog at

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