By: Danielle Kingsley
I recently dated a great guy for a few months. He had all the key qualities and character traits I’ve ever wanted in a godly man, and on top of that, he was all kinds of handsome. On paper, we were perfect for each other. We had so much in common, we made each other laugh, we served together, and we challenged one another. I thought I’d finally met God’s match for me, but I was wrong. After a few months it was apparent that we were not meant for each other despite trying to make it work, and ultimately he said goodbye.
Dating relationships begin and end every day. Most of us have gone through our share of heartbreak. It’s hard to say goodbye to the hope of a future with someone. It hurts our hearts to see a relationship end when we didn’t want it to. Heartache can be brutal.
When we invite God into our breakups, we can see the gift of failed dating relationships. Here are three things God has taught me through this breakup.
1. End with grace, not bitterness.
Saying goodbye with grace gives more closure than any Taylor Swift or Kelly Clarkson anthem can ever give. You don’t need to resent the person you were dating just because it ended. You cared enough about him to enter into a relationship, so care enough about him to exit the relationship in a way that glorifies God. You don’t need to be bitter to move on. Be thankful for the good times you two shared, learn what you need to learn, let your heart heal, and move on to God’s best for you.
2. Checklists aren’t everything.
Like most girls I know, I too have a “Husband Checklist.” Let me tell you, checklists aren’t everything! The man I was dating checked off every quality on my list, but he wasn’t meant for me. I want to be surprised, and allow God to orchestrate my love story with a man who possesses qualities I never knew I wanted in a husband. Don’t you?
3. Thank Him for your breakup.
This is a tough one, but I believe it’s vital for growing and healing during this time. God doesn’t waste heartbreak. He is working all things together for your good, so trust in God’s plan and rejoice in this season he has you in. One day, you and I will both look back at this breakup and have nothing but thanks to give to God because he saved us for His very best!
Photo Cred: Danielle Kingsley
Danielle Kingsley, a Southern California native, served as a missionary and worship leader for ten years at a growing church planted by her family in Salt Lake City, Utah. In 2007, Danielle moved to Nashville, Tennessee where she was provided the opportunity to be the original vocalist to record the now popular worship song, Your Great Name. In 2013, she released her first EP Falling, that generated two #1 singles on International Christian radio.
Since the recent loss of her father to a brief battle with cancer, Danielle has been sharing her story about finding hope through loss and the peace that is found in Jesus at a variety of conferences across the United States. She is writing her first children’s book and devotional, and is currently on tour with Secret Keeper Girls. Check out her blog at www.DanielleKingsley.com. Follow her on Instagram, Facebook & Twitter @DKingsleyMusic